Carmen Horne

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Because Sometimes Our Marriages Begin to Smell

by Carmen Horne 24 Comments

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Are you ready to give up? It’s awkward and lonesome. Conversation is minimal and you wonder what in the world you used to spend hours discussing. Maybe the family’s bottom line is in the red because of your spending or he betrayed his marriage vows by being unfaithful.

Possibly it wasn’t something nearly that definitive. Life happened and family drama happened and careers happened and…

Harsh words were spoken. Promises were broken.

Can I remind you of Jesus’ good friend’s story? (11:1-43)

John tells it like this…”A man named Lazarus was sick. He lived in Bethany with his sisters, Mary and Martha.  So the two sisters sent a message to Jesus telling him, ‘Lord, your dear friend is very sick.’ Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus.” Their brother, Jesus’ friend, was buried and in a place that seemed unredeemable.

Perhaps your marriage is like Lazarus. Your love is dead, your desire is dead, your respect and trust are buried – long enough to stink. Our marriage has been in the stinky stage too. What I know, because I have lived it, is that Jesus can breathe new life into dead relationships.

How?

Jesus looked hard at them and said, “No chance at all if you think you can pull it off yourself. Every chance in the world if you trust God to do it.” Matthew 19:26, MSG

Marriage FB 6-1-15

A resurrection can happen. Mary and Martha ran to the one they knew could change the situation. And, when it seemed hopeless, Martha still clung to what she knew, “ But even now I know that God will give you whatever you ask.”

Run to God, find a good Christian counselor, and get your friends to help you pray. Just like the raising of Lazarus, the resurrection of your dead marriage will shine with the glory of God. Then, you can run to Jesus for the couple that He has placed in your path. You can run there with hope because the two of you threw off those burial clothes that wrapped your marriage and now live to tell your story.

But when Jesus heard about it he said, ‘…it happened for the glory of God so that the Son of God will receive glory from this.”

Will you not give up today? Together you can hear Jesus say, “…come out!”

Next week my good friend Sabra Penley will be guest posting for Marriage Monday. Sabra and her husband David’s ministry focuses on marriage. Check them out at Simply One and of course here next week as she shares from her heart.

Linking with…
Kelly Balarie’s #raralinkup, Holly Barrett’s Testimony Tuesday , Beth Steffaniak’s Wedded Wednesday and Crystal Storms’ Intentional Tuesday

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Filed Under: Faith, Hope & Joy, Forgiveness, Healing, Love, Marriage

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Comments

  1. Anita Ojeda says

    June 5, 2015 at 4:43 pm

    I’ve seen God resurrect my parent’s marriage, so I know that he is faithful and willing to help me when I’m feeling buried in my marriage.

    Reply
    • Carmen says

      June 5, 2015 at 7:42 pm

      Amen Anita! God is still in the miracle business. Good to see you today friend.

      Reply
  2. Crystal Storms says

    June 3, 2015 at 10:38 am

    And lived to tell about it … what joy to have shaken off those burial clothes … for Lazarus, for your marriage, Carmen, and my own. What a beautiful comparison to the transformation that can occur when we look to Jesus for our marriages. Thank you, Carmen, for sharing your heart at #IntentionalTuesday on Intentionally Pursuing. : )

    Reply
    • Carmen says

      June 3, 2015 at 8:58 pm

      So glad to linkup Crystal. You are doing a great work for God over there. I appreciate your heart for ministry.

      Reply
  3. Kristine says

    June 3, 2015 at 5:31 am

    Carmen, I love the look of your website. It’s so inviting! Great lesson today, too. Your writing style really connects with me:) Blessings friend!

    Reply
  4. Kristine says

    June 3, 2015 at 5:28 am

    Awesome advice, Carmen. I always enjoy reading your lessons. You simplify it and share it in a way that makes sense and resonates deep within me:) Blessings my friend!

    Reply
    • Carmen says

      June 3, 2015 at 8:30 am

      Thank you so much Kristine for your kind words and encouragement. You have blessed me today.

      Reply
  5. Kelly Balarie says

    June 2, 2015 at 10:58 am

    I love how you bring this back to the unredeemable place and the Lazarus story. Powerful Carmen. I love it. All things are possible with Christ. Much love to you as you keep on bringing hearts out of places of hopelessness. Cheering on today from the #RaRalinkup on Purposeful Faith.

    Reply
  6. Cherrilynn Bisbano says

    June 2, 2015 at 7:59 am

    Amen. God has resurrected many things for me. I know if my husband and I did not have Him we probably would not be together. God is so good.

    Reply
    • Carmen says

      June 2, 2015 at 1:47 pm

      I totally agree Cherrilynn. Thanks for stopping by and sharing your heart.

      Reply
  7. Ginger Harrington says

    June 2, 2015 at 7:54 am

    I have never thought of the application of the raising of Lazarus relating to marriage. What a powerful reminder that God can raise the dead to life in any area of our lives. Linking with you today at @Testimony Tuesday. Have a great week!

    Reply
    • Carmen says

      June 2, 2015 at 1:47 pm

      Ginger, I had never connected that concept with marriage either. Then, I began thinking about how God breathes new life in so many areas of our lives. Amazing Holy Spirit power!

      Reply
  8. Ruthie Gray says

    June 2, 2015 at 7:39 am

    You are so right! It’s tough, the daily grind together. Even without a major happening, it’s tough, but add that in and it looks impossible. But it’s not! With God, ALL things are possible, and I love the Message’s translation of Matthew 19:26, I have it favorited in my iPhone Bible!
    Thanks for sharing on Testimony Tuesday, I’m your neighbor!

    Reply
    • Carmen says

      June 2, 2015 at 1:20 pm

      I just love The Message Ruthie. I don’t usually use it to study but I almost always check it out when I am reading. It is so quotable. Thanks for stopping by neighbor!

      Reply
  9. Emily @ Morning Motivated Mom says

    June 2, 2015 at 7:38 am

    “No chance at all if you think you can pull it off yourself. Every chance in the world if you trust God to do it.”

    This is such a great reminder for marriage, but also in so many other aspects of life!

    Reply
    • Carmen says

      June 2, 2015 at 1:18 pm

      So true Emily. That promise applies to all of life. Blessings!

      Reply
      • Emily @ Morning Motivated Mom says

        June 2, 2015 at 2:13 pm

        Thanks for stopping by and adding your post to our linkup. We would love to have you stop by again next Tuesday!

        Reply
        • Carmen says

          June 2, 2015 at 2:20 pm

          I love meeting new friends. Thanks for the invite Emily!

          Reply
  10. Kristi says

    June 2, 2015 at 7:35 am

    Such a good post, Carmen. And, Martha’s faith? Wow! This morning it painted a picture of strength and encouragement, direction and hope. Yes, we simply need to go back to the truth, be reminded of it. I’m taking this one to the bank today! xo #intentionaltuesday

    Reply
    • Carmen says

      June 2, 2015 at 1:17 pm

      So glad you visited today Kristi. You always encourage us all.

      Reply
  11. Betsy says

    June 2, 2015 at 3:21 am

    Thanks for this encouragement to hang in there and stick it out, Carmen. Such an important topic. This is where so many couples give up and miss out on the blessing of life-long partnership. Just last weekend a friend asked for prayer for her marriage. Don’t really know much about the problem, but I’m praying, and I know God will work!

    Reply
    • Carmen says

      June 2, 2015 at 1:17 pm

      You are a great friend Betsy and one who is trusted with your friend’s pain. I know God hears and answers. I’m living proof!

      Reply
  12. Sabra Penley says

    June 1, 2015 at 11:02 am

    Love this, Carmen! Stinky marriages. Thanks for sharing words of hope and truth into our lives. The message of God being able to bring back to life what we can’t imagine is encouragement we all need to hear!

    Reply
    • Carmen says

      June 2, 2015 at 10:53 am

      I am so glad God is in the resurrection business. I have a few things in my life that have needed it. Blessings friend. Looking forward to what God gives you to share here next week.

      Reply

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"Rarely will you find a woman with such a servant’s heart as Carmen Horne. I have had the pleasure of attending many church events, trips, and girl lunches with Carmen over the past sixteen years. She continues to be one of my favorite mentors whether in North Louisiana or on the beach in Florida, which is probably OUR FAVORITE place! She uses her kind and faithful heart when giving advice or mentoring others. Carmen is truly a light to many and guides you to find the light in yourself no matter how faint it may be. Hebrews 13:7"

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