This post is part of Lysa TerKeurst’s “The Best Yes” Blog Tour which I am delighted to be a part of along with many other great bloggers. To learn more and join us, CLICK HERE.
My eyes are heavy as I drive home from work. There is an internal dialogue going on that reminds me of a CD on replay. Don’t forget to stop by the store. I need to check on mom. As I pass the fitness center- I might as well cancel my membership. I push the button on the garage door opener and think, try to write some tonight – try to get in bed earlier tonight. And… Tears are close and I feel defeated.
Quoting Lysa, “The decisions you make determine the schedule you keep. The schedule you keep determines the life you live. And how you live your life determines how you spend your soul.” Somehow, some way we have to learn how to go from yes girls to best yes girls. A change that will feel very uncomfortable. Quoting Dr. Henry Cloud, ““We change our behavior when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of changing.” Being wonder woman is beginning to hurt.
I love to see a smile spread across the face of someone I just gave a yes to. Both of us feel so excited-so accomplished. But as I fall into bed at night and exhaustion is so heavy on my body I am almost breathless, I am reminded that all of my yeses have wrapped me in web of disappointment. A web that I can feel more than others can see.
We live in a people pleasing world. When we say no, smiles fade. Quoting Lysa again, “…a Best Yes girl will sometimes feel exposed. Fidgety. Out of place. Insecure. And oh-so-incredibly awkward.”
I feel no more vulnerable than when I must say no to something good to say yes to something better.
How does my Best Yes look these days? It’s looking more like face to face time with my family instead of Facebook time with my 600 friends. We are enjoying more date nights and hand holding and catching up on our show. It’s beginning to smell more like food that is not in a takeout container and a lot more like my favorite scented gel in a relaxing shower. My Best Yes is the lovely sound of keys tapping on a keyboard as I write my heart’s story and intimate like my sweetheart’s voice. My best yes can still feel awkward but deep down it always feels right.
How do we get there? A good place to start is to look at our lives realistically. Here’s some advice from Lysa… “It’s not wrong to use wisdom, knowledge, and an understanding of your resource capacity to assess your decision.
Do I have the resources to handle this request along with my current responsibilities? Could this fit?
Let’s learn to make wise decisions in the midst of endless demands.
The ideas and concepts in this book will definitely change our thought process on answering yes. You can grab a copy at The Best Yes or many book retailers online and near you.
Until we visit again,